Comments on: It happens all the time

By: J'Kerian

J'Kerian — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 21:26:03 +0000

I’ve also read this article, and the “heh-heh” was quite offensive to me as well.

But then I wondered why the article was even published. Although terribly heartbreaking, this was hardly news.

By: Andy

Andy — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 21:11:44 +0000

Just found your blog after listening to Mothertongue – Section 2, on the cover of Wire this month. Beautiful piece.

But what sad story you report here.

By: Michael

Michael — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 12:25:44 +0000

Apropos of bullying, last night’s HBO program, “Autism: The Musical”, was heartrending. I’m sure it will be repeated often.

By: killian

killian — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 08:57:55 +0000

Horrifying incident, all the more so because it is more and more common. Here I was thinking that metrosexual had finally become the norm. . .
It terrifies me that the “markers” that identify one as different are SO bound up in a ridiculously narrow understanding of gender. As if “liking girls” could protect this dear young man. . .

and, of course your musical homage/reaction was quite moving–giving voice to the voiceless–where is that Spivak blog when you need it?

By: Tim

Tim — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 02:47:22 +0000

Gotta say, reading it here was jarring for me, too. But reading the entire Times story, which included the first “heh heh” mentioned in the above comments put it more clearly into context.

I wouldn’t go so far as to call it “intrusive.” Unnecessary, perhaps.

Also, interesting that a number of us (myself included) immediately presumed Billy was gay. Interesting, too, that the author probably anticipated this and so included the bit about Billy liking girls.

By: Michael

Michael — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 19:11:47 +0000

I think Valerie is right – the second heh-heh is an ironic shadow of the first. But it is at best clumsy, and in a story this sad irony is intrusive.

By: Robert

Robert — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 19:03:28 +0000

The “heh-heh” echoes an earlier one in the article, and is therefore not so weird:

“It began years ago when a boy called the house and asked Billy if he wanted to buy a certain sex toy, heh-heh.”

The writing, I think, unequivocally condemns the bullies.

But the “eh-eh” in the Afghanistan article is jarring. It’s like a print article trying to be NPR.

By: Valerie

Valerie — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 18:57:30 +0000

Funny you should pick up on that. I did too. I thought it referred back to an earlier moment in the article:
“It began years ago when a boy called the house and asked Billy if he wanted to buy a certain sex toy, heh-heh. Billy told his mother, who informed the boyâ€™s mother. ”
But I don’t think it works, in any context. It certainly pulled me up short.

By: Art

Art — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 18:08:31 +0000

Actually, there have been a fair number of lawsuits around the country on behalf of teenagers — mainly boys — subjected to anti-gay harassment at school, some of which have been resolved by imposing liability on school administrators for their refusal to take effective measures to protect the kids who are in their care. Based on Dan Barry’s article, it sounds to me as if Billy Wolfe may have a good legal claim against the Fayetteville school administrators. And the possibility of such liability is supposed to be the spur to the administrators to take action…

By: Michael

Michael — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 14:57:32 +0000

or perhaps I should just say whenever kids are bullied, since there is no suggestion in the article that this young man is gay.

By: Michael

Michael — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 14:54:29 +0000

I was upset by the “heh-heh” as well and wonder if possibly the quotation marks were misplaced and should have included the heh-heh as part of the facebook quote. In any event, my stomach gets tied up in knots whenever young gay kids are bullied — or worse.